Paying For It: Sook-Yin Lee and Chester Brown's Saga of a Cooled-But-Still-Cool Relationship
By Karen Gordon
Rating: B-plus
Paying For It is a kind of reverse rom-com, a surprisingly tender movie about a couple redefining their relationship, each going their own way without coming apart as friends.
It’s also about a man finding what he’s looking for in relationships with sex workers.
The film, directed by creative whirlwind Sook-Yin Lee, who co-wrote the script with Joanne Sarazen, is based on the best selling semi-autobiographical graphic novel by Chester Brown. There’s a deliberate art-imitates-life component: Brown was Lee’s real life romantic partner, and the graphic novel and the film chronicles part of their relationship.
Emily Lê and Dan Beirne in Paying For It
Sonny Lee (Emily Lê) and Chester Brown (Dan Beirne) are a young, artsy couple who have been in a long-term relationshjp, living together in a small house in Toronto’s Kensington Market. She’s a VJ on a music channel called MaxMusic, and he writes and illustrates graphic novels.
There's affection, but much less spark between the two.
One night, Sonny, whose disposition seems to match her name, tells Chester that she thinks she might be falling in love with someone else and wants to explore that without destroying their relationship. She wants to know if that’s okay with him.
Chester agrees. And the two begin to live somewhat separate lives in their little house, at first sharing the same bed. As Emily’s relationship with Miles (Ehren Kassam) heats up, Chester moves downstairs to the basement, where he has his workspace.
This arrangement would be a bumpy ride for most people, and at first Chester seems less than comfortable, especially as he can hear Sonny and Miles getting romantic. But there’s good will and genuine affection between the two almost-exes, and so they make it work.
Some of this is down to Chester’s disposition. He’s an introvert, but not a push-over, and a genuinely nice guy who doesn’t seem to have any bitterness in him.
But it’s clear that he’s also lost something, some spark. He might not be completely happy with the new arrangement, but as he begins to deal with it, he starts to consider his own needs. When one of his fellow graphic novelist friends offhandedly suggests he consider going to a prostitute, Chester takes the idea seriously.
He decides to try. He hires a sex worker, and when he likes the experience, begins to explore. Things seem less about sex with him, he’s a fairly perfunctory lover, and more about getting to spend time with different women.
When Sonny finds out, she is less than impressed and draws some boundaries. But by that point Chester is well into figuring out why this works for him, and what kind of relationship he wants and needs.
This is a story that could easily have descended into something very seamy, but Lee keeps the film's tone light. Sonny and Chester are lovely people, who are on the level and really, really like each other.
Lee treats the sex workers like human beings, and for the most part, lets them talk about why they do what they do. There are a few scenes that are uncomfortable, as Chester rejects certain women, or has certain encounters. But she avoids judging the morality or correctness of his choices. She leaves it to Chester, who regularly hangs out with a trio of fellow graphic novelists, to defend his choices.
And Sonny runs through a series of conventional relationships in search of a permanent relationship.
Should we be juxtaposing the results of each of their choices to figure out which one of them has chosen the better route? Paying For It never asks us to. Instead, what we see is two people who genuinely love each other, even when the relationship shifts from romance, into something different.
That love and respect, which exists between the real world former partners, forms a framework of sweetness for the film.
Paying For It. Directed by Sook-Yin Lee, written by Sook-Yin Lee and Joanne Sarazen, starring Emily Lê and Dan Beirne. Theatres: Toronto - January 31 - Feb 6 - Scotiabank Cineplex; Whitehorse - Feb 8 - Yukon Arts Centre (Available Light Film Festival); Victoria - Feb 12 - The Vic Theatre (Victoria Film Festival); Vancouver - Feb 15, 16 - Vancity Cinema; Winnipeg - Feb 13, 15, 19, 23 - Dave Barber Cinematheque; Ottawa - Feb 22, 23, 26, 27 - Bytowne Cinema; Charlottetown - Feb 7-13 - Tivoli Cinema; St. Catharines - Feb 21, 25, 27 - Film House Cinema