The Columnist: Dutch tale of a woman writer who snaps and kills online trolls is amusing but could have hit harder

By Thom Ernst

Rating: B-minus

Warning: language in this review of The Columnist may offend sensitive readers, mainly the Dutch. The actual offense gets lost in translation, which boils down to one thing: the title. 

So, what's in a title?

Well, if the title is Der Kut Hoer (apologies to those who can read Dutch), as it appears in the original poster, somewhat obscured (for a good reason) by actor Katja Herbers as the bloodied and knife-wielding Femke Boot, then the title is everything.  

An online troll is about to receive an unpleasant reply in the real world from Femke (Katje Herbers).

To those who can't read Dutch, trust me; Der Kut Hoer does not translate into The Columnist.  Even Google simmers down the actual translation of Kut (sorry) to more colloquial slang. And that too is a word I'm reluctant to use. 

But we're adults. Provocative titles are not new, not even to English language films: Young People Fucking, The Rolling Stones: Cocksucker Blues, Snatch, Free Willy, to name a few. So, a title, even one as unabashedly base as Der Kut Hoer (there it is again), can set the proper tone going into the film. Unfortunately, North American audiences are left with a more socially acceptable title, The Columnist, shoving aside all radical implications the original title implies. 

The Columnist begins with a television talk show where author Femke Boot appears with horror writer Steven Dood (Bram van der Kelen). They discuss social media and how anonymity paves the way for vile discourse without responsibility. Dood accepts dialogue on all levels while Boot, who is on the receiving end of some very nasty tweets, argues for decent interactions. 

PROUDLY SUPPORTS ORIGINAL-CIN

"Can't we disagree politely?" she asks. 

For a seasoned columnist, Boot's position, however correct, seems naively optimistic. And the evidence is in the relish her haters take in bringing her down. The tweets and Facebook posts build from insults to death threats, sexual violence, and unfounded accusations. The police are unsympathetic, and Boot's boyfriend urges tactical ignorance. But Boot has a more effective solution to dealing with online trolls.  

 The breaking point for Boot comes when she discovers that her neighbour is one of the offending contributors. The film cleverly chooses to represent Boot's being pushed to the edge by having her climb out on a rooftop to confront her tormentor. This first killing happens in such a casual and careless way as to be dreamlike. It would not be inappropriate to have the scene cut to her springing up in bed, sweating from the effects of a recent nightmare. But there is no dream sequence, and this killing is just the beginning of her murderous spree. 

As seems evident by his IMDB photo, director Ivo van Aart is a young man who brings an unmistakably young man's interpretation to the story. The Columnist (using the North American title for now) though violent and bloodier, lacks the bite of a film like Promising Young Woman, the movie to which it's most likely to be compared.

The Columnist is a revenge tale that exists in a realm of fables and allegories. It is a fairy tale that is more Grimm than Aesop. And because Aart isn't concerned with realism or gaping plot holes that allow Boot to go undetected despite careless daylight killings, the film bounces between parody and parable. Despite the film's willingness to playfully stir unrest, it never reaches its full potential, and the promise of confronting abusers who hide behind avatars gets second billing to a less exciting defense of free speech.  

And yet, The Columnist works because of Katja Herbers’ performance. Herbers’ shift from pained victim to vigilante is slow. Her breakdown happens without hysterics or any noticeable dip in her emotional stability. 

Vital too is a sub-story around Boot's teenage daughter Anna (Claire Porro) in a public battle against school censorship. Porro embodies Anna with levels of angst and vulnerability, a teenager combating institutional adversity with strident activism and an inherent need to fight oppression. And though Anna may be blissfully ignorant about where her fight comes from, Porro is acutely aware that Anna is indeed her mother's child.

But let's return for a moment to the film's original title: Der Kut Hoer. If you know the translation, you might agree that the title, if used against Femke Boot, is indeed offensive. But the title could alternately be a fierce war cry. And by the looks of the image on the poster, it is. 

Call it The Columnist and Aart's film is an amusing but conventional revenge story. Call it Der Kut Hoer, and it's a story told with a vengeance. 

To paraphrase Boot before she pulverizes someone's head with a frying pan, "Je noemde de verkeerde hoer en hoer."  And that says it all.  

The Columnist is directed by Ivo van Aart and stars Katja Herber, Claire Porro and Bram van der Kelen. The Columnist opens on Virtual Cinema, VOD and Digital Friday May 7, 2021.